Celebrating the Ups & Riding Out the Downs

What It’s About: This past week, I received an unexpected email telling me that I’ve been selected to be on HRD’s inaugural Global 100 list. I don’t want to overplay these awards, and yet honestly, it feels good to be acknowledged. I felt the same way when I received Canada’s Lifetime Achievement Award. One of my most treasured moments was co-receiving the Chairman's Award when I was at US WEST. It was a big deal. However, for every “award” or recognition during my career, I humbly remind myself of the many “kick in the pants” moments. As an example, after a “shooting star” career at US WEST, the ending fizzled with me totally burnt out. I felt empty and discarded. When I was COO of a public company, where I worked night and day to make it profitable, I abruptly left for a “guaranteed 10 bagger” start-up (it eventually ditched in the .com crash). The Chairman of the incumbent company felt abandoned, and upon reflection, he had a point. That decision personally cost me millions of dollars. Ouch. Working at ATB was wonderful in every way, and I left on a high. The company treated me about as well as one might ever hope. I could go on with many highs and lows over a 40-plus year career cruise. An honest reflection would map a road trip with ample amounts of both “flat tire” causing pot-holes, and incredible vistas. 

So What?: I think what I’ve learned is that when it’s going great, ENJOY IT. Accept that being disappointed is unavoidable. That’s just real life, even though Facebook and Instagram often portray something of a picturesque, positive fantasy. However, do not live by looking over your shoulder or expecting the worst. I was reading an article in this Sunday’s NYT and I thought I’d share this sound advice about a way of viewing the ups and downs: “Constantly expecting the worst? According to Laura Oliff, associate director of the American Institute for Cognitive Therapy, it might be because you’re hoping to protect yourself from disappointment. But by trying to insulate yourself from life’s ups and downs, you’re missing out on something else, too: the ‘positive anticipation of events,’ which Dr. Oliff called a ‘very valuable’ and ‘joyful’ feeling. (For proof, just think about the pleasure of anticipating a vacation.) As Dr. Oliff pointed out, ‘You’ll be disappointed at times no matter what.’ So if your choice is between positive expectations that are occasionally proven wrong, or negative expectations that are occasionally proven right, you might as well go with the former. While this mind-set shift is easier described than done, Dr. Oliff said it can help to remember that ‘many of the negative things we predict never actually happen’ — and that, even when they do, we usually recover pretty quickly.”

I’m romanticizing things a bit I guess, and the following description may cause judgy smirks. So be it. My self image is that of a weathered, grizzled, totally imperfect cowboy sitting saddle sore but gratified on his horse near the end of a cattle ride. I want to thank all the people who I love, loved me back, and have accepted my many shortcomings, while giving me so much joy. And a special thank you to all the pot-holes and ruts. They continue to keep me humble, always learning. One way or another, I’m declaring it a fun ride and I’m not done yet. More joy (and disappointments) to come. Yeehaw and giddy-up. 

Think Big, Start Small, Act Now, 

- Lorne 

One Millennial View: Well, the NYT article spoiled my tid-bit of wisdom here, but I really do believe in the idea of always, no matter what, having something on the calendar to look forward to. Vacations, etc, are obvious examples, but it doesn’t have to be that big. Little mini-milestones that don’t even matter that much can suffice. For example, I’m somewhere between my 639th and 700th class at OrangeTheory within two years (I’m glad I’ve lost track because I don’t want to know when my 666th takes place). They’ll let me know when I hit 700. That doesn’t matter at all to anyone but me, however it’s just a little but positive thing to keep track of. Having plenty of those little mini-milestones going on is a fun way to keep optimism high, even when things are low. 

- Garrett